MTSS 13: Porn

We primarily look at mainstream porn, but there is a wealth of material out there. Some good, some bad, and some hilarious.

95 Responses to “MTSS 13: Porn”


  1. 1 Curvaceous Dee

    That was a hoot - loved the Shakepspeare!

    Oh, and watching this reminded me of an Erica Jong quote: “My reaction to porno films is as follows: After the first ten minutes, I want to go home and screw. After the first twenty minutes, I never want to screw again as long as I live.”

    xx Dee

  2. 2 Christian

    Oooh, that ladder stunt looks real. Hope Britney did not get hurt.
    Good work and … yeh, male actors! And yeh, man on man porn on MTSS! (Not that I’m into it, I’m hetero male, but you are right: What’s with man on man?)

    I don’t like mainstream porn either. It just gets nastier and nastier. Sometimes I wish to un-see things.

  3. 3 Melissa Gira

    Nikol can attest that I’m both:

    1. A retired porn performer
    and
    2. A real woman.

    Just saying, most of the reason women in porn seem totally fake is because for some reason, people think men (who most porn producers think are the only people who want to look at porn) can’t deal with real women having real sex.

    Or, you should see how totally boring and dorky me & most other people who’ve done and do porn look when we’re not in front of the camera.

  4. 4 Ames

    As usual, an excellent episode. Though I don’t think I’ll be able to schedule my family portraits at Sears this year without at least chuckling a bit.
    Great prat-fall, Britney!

  5. 5 Ames

    As usual, an excellent episode. Though, I don’t think I’ll be able to schedule my family portraits at Sears this year without at least chuckling a bit.
    Britney, great prat-fall!

  6. 6 Krista

    Thank you for everything you are doing! My 13 year old has been watching your show. It might be a little on the young side for some visitors, but he has had a fairly thorough age-appropriate sex-education all his life, because I used to work for Child Protective Services. I saw way too many kids that didn’t get that early enough or at all. It gives him some idea of the real world and a chance to start conversation with me when he has questions. I may not always agree with your humor, but I have heard far worse on the playgrounds of his middle school.

    Anyway, he has already seen porn thanks to mistyping Nintendo a while ago, so I like the middle ground stance you took on it. Anyway, please keep it up!

  7. 7 mary

    Thanks for taking on a tough topic and making some valid points (watching porn can stunt men’s sexuality, women in porn don’t look like real women, don’t take pictures of yourself having sex–it will get out). I especially liked the ending–watching it can be depressing. Let’s not forget that women in porn are real women, even if they don’t always look like it–especially when we see stuff we want to un-see (great comment, Christian). Keep up the good work.

  8. 8 Claire

    Just when I thought MTSS couldn’t get any hotter … MINX! <3

  9. 9 Michel

    Bonjour!

    One of the best! Thanks!

    (PS: Oooof coooourse… Keep on the excellent work! No, I mean it, realy; it is excellent…)

  10. 10 Martin

    Excellent episode as always.

    I was wondering if anybody else is having problems with the file for the latest episode in the podcast feed. They download, but then iTunes complains that the files are corrupted and won’t play them.

    I tried various methods of downloading and same result.

  11. 11 Anna

    Fantastic episode as always, though the Female Masturbation and Abstinence ones will always be my favourites.

  12. 12 Bob

    The guy with the dark brown hair.. I’d hit it.

    Hard.

  13. 13 Tenerife

    Ted Bundy, anyone?

  14. 14 Nick

    Yeah I’m with Bob hes a Hottie! Along with… Scott!
    But yeah! Love the episode, and can’t wait for the next one!

  15. 15 Kelev

    Like anything, there’s good porn and bad porn. I’ve seen porn that is depressing and ugly, and porn that is educational, uplifting, funny, even heart-warming.

    Gay porn does tend to be better than straight porn. I actually know a lot of lesbians who like gay male porn; the aesthetics, the mood, beautiful - often androgynous - men are sometimes a turn-on even for dykes.

    Porn can also teach us about how bodies work, what can go where and how, what might (or might not) be fun to try etc. After the dry, clinical descriptions of sex-for-reproduction that most kids get in sex ed. (assuming they get sex ed. at all!) sticky wet closeups of bodies in action just might help answer the many questions that remain.

    Finally, any mention of porn where kids are concerned needs, I think, to put the myth to rest that porn “damages” kids, turning them into perverts etc.

    *No* research has ever found a credible, causal link between porn and sex crimes, after years of critics trying very hard to find such evidence. If anything, the opposite seems to be true; for example, research by Diamond & Uchiyama (1999) conducted in a number of counties actually found that, in those countries where porn was more widespread, sexual violence - including crimes by and against juveniles - was actually lower than in locales where porn was strictly regulated and/or prohibited. Even the Reagan Administration’s Meese Commission found this to be true, despite their best efforts to whip up popular hysteria against porn. If there was any evidence that porn was “harmful” by any objective measure of the word, we would have found it by now. We haven’t.

    (Obviously women who are forced into porn are harmed by it, but anyone forced into any work - sexual or otherwise - is similarly harmed. Likewise, people who are forced to watch porn against their will can be traumatised, but so can people forced to go to church; it’s not the object itself that is the source of the trauma, but the force associated with it).

    Like most things about sex, it is not the porn that seems to be damaging, but rather the hysteria, shame, and guilt that prurient prudes load on to what people find pleasurable.

  16. 16 Laura

    Once again, fantastic show! Keep it up!!!

  17. 17 Someone

    Two questions
    1. What the hell is jean sitting?
    2. Can you change your feed so that the videos show up. thanks! :)

  18. 18 Shane

    Best episode yet! Absolutely hilarious! I think I ruptured an important internal organ during the Shakespeare scene.

  19. 19 Pvt. Joker

    Great episode. Brittney is phenomenal as always and the new guy (chubby one)…man He’s my hero. I love the “I already had a foursome at work” line. I almost choked.

    Porno is fun to watch, but when I watched with my wife once, she laughed so hard, she pissed me off.
    She couldn’t help but laugh at the horrid acting and “plastic” women. She’s right about that, but I still can appreciate a decent porno from time to time.
    Not with my wife though.

  20. 20 Nate

    Oh My God! Britney, that moshing was the funniest thing I had seen this whole week. All I can say is thank you!!!!
    p.s. was that a calvin klein reference I spotted?

  21. 21 infinite

    ah FINALLY some PORN!!! jk. Loved how you credited Shakespere as a writer.

  22. 22 Jay but not Gay

    Hey MTSS!

    Excellent episode, once again!

    i felt that some points were missing, maybe an explanation of why the desire to watch pornography or perhaps the effects on teenagers inhibitions and lack of performance when having sex because they are afraid of not being as good as what they see in porn films.

    anyway great episode

  23. 23 Guy

    Martin, try deleting the episode and downloading again from iTunes. An early feed went out with a corrupted file.

    Otherwise the episode can be downloaded here:

    http://feeds.feedburner.com/MidwestTeenSexShow

    Melissa–we had a piece about how while some porn may seem “fake” the people are always real. That bit got lost in the editing. So much more to cover on this topic, and so much more “research” for us to perform.

  24. 24 mary

    Kelev,
    I take issue with some of your points.
    First, I’m not sure what you mean by “Finally, any mention of porn where kids are concerned needs, I think, to put the myth to rest that porn “damages” kids, turning them into perverts etc.” I don’t know if you mean that it’s a myth that porn damages kids when they are shown it at a very young age against their will? or by kids you mean teenagers who view porn? Of course no one factor can account for human behavior. I don’t think that people claim that kids who are shown porn against their will are turned into perverts–I think they claim that it traumatizes them when it comes to their later sexuality. If by “kids” you mean “teens” I don’t think viewing porn turns teens into perverts, but I *do* think it changes the nature of their sexuality. Over and over I have heard that young men who grow up masturbating to porn have trouble having sex with a real female partner without thinking about porn. The adolescent brain is not fully formed and when it is conditioned in a certain way, the orgasm being a powerful conditioning mechanism, it is surely going to have an effect on sexuality. Again, I am not saying that it makes young men into perverts–but it will affect their sexuality, and in my opinion, in a negative way.
    Second, the link between pornography and violence is complex. There have been studies that have linked viewing of violent and degrading pornography to sex crimes. Not necessarily on a societal level, because there are many mediating factors like poverty, reporting of sex crimes etc that can make showing that casual link pretty difficult. But laboratory studies do show that men who are predisposed to violence towards women have more violent attitudes towards women after viewing pornography. Interviews with sex offenders frequently mention their use of pornography before and during committing acts. Victims/survivors of sex crimes point to the exposure to pornography in forming their ability to avoid and resist rape. Of course not every man who uses pornography becomes a rapist, and of course not every rapist has used pornography, but there is evidence of a link.
    For those of you who haven’t taken a look at what is considered “mainstream” these days, it’s not your parent’s porn.
    As for your point that being forced into anything is bad and it is the act of being forced, not the object you are being forced to watch, somehow, I think there is a qualitative difference in being forced to sit through an hour of mass every sunday and being forced to watch a women begin penetrated in all 3 orifices of her body. And then having a guy pull his penis out of her anus and stick it in her mouth for the ever popular ATM.
    Third, we haven’t even discussed the misogynistic and racist language that is often used in porn….It’s too depressing.
    Kelev, I know you said that there is good porn and bad porn, but there is WAY too much bad porn out there to try to make this arguement. I don’t know where you’re finding this “good” porn, but its not in mainstream shops.

  25. 25 James HotMovies

    Awesome episode.

    I think its important to always mention (as you did) that porn isn’t real and is only ever meant for entertainment purposes… like pro wrestling or the news.

    Good advice on personal sex tapes, too.

  26. 26 Matt

    It’s TWENTY. My new favorite joke of the season!

    So I’m fickle, sue me.

    And just in case any of the kids are wondering: that was real Shakespeare. Billy was a horny ol’ goat.

  27. 27 Matt

    Wow. You guys got some clout. I’d heard Shakespeare was retired…..

  28. 28 Kelev

    Mary,

    Simply put, no study, anywhere has ever found a reliable and causal link between ‘porn’ and any measurable, reliable, valid and operationalisable definition of ‘harm’ for anyone, of any age - pre-adolescent, adolescent, or adult.

    I’ve mentioned elsewhere here that I’m a professional researcher, finishing my dissertation in the area of childhood development and education. I’m also a sex educator who has been following such issues for many years. As such, I pay close attention to the other emerging research out there, good and bad.

    Unfortunately, there is a lot of bad research out there; Fox (Faux) News, Dr. Phil, Oprah Book-of-the-Month-Club, pop-psychology pulp. Research purporting to show that “men who consume porn can’t please their wives” has never adequately controlled for the possibility that the men in question had pre-existing dysfunctions, of which the porn is a symptom - not the cause. Nor does such research account for the presence of other problems in the couples’ relationship, and so forth.

    The other example you cite, mentioning the “powerful conditioning mechanism” of the orgasm sounds like it’s straight out of the one of the newest areas of emerging pseudo-science concerning the problem of “porn-addiction”. Promulgators of these half-baked theories attempt to construct sex, porn, and orgasms as “addictive substances”, comparing the effects of orgasms on the brain to that of heroin or meth. These forced marriages of medicine and pop-psychology lure us in using the co-opted language of medicine, yet once again lack any of the scientific measures and reliability of real medical science. Despite what the therapists and self-help gurus say in order to sell their services to unsuspecting and unhappy souls in search of help, no research has ever been able to pin the cause of people’s suffering on to the porn they’ve seen or consumed, as opposed other problems in their lives with which their porn consumption has little or no relation.

    Likewise for research examining porn and violence; at best the relationship is correlational, not causal.

    Of course, we run into ethical questions when trying to examine such issues; for obvious reasons we can’t just sit kids down, have them watch a load of porn of all types, then see what happens. This is why the research like that of Diamond & Uchiyama I mention above is important. It’s the next best thing.

    Not that researchers haven’t occasionally had youngsters look at porn. In one such Dutch study researchers showed elementary-school-aged youngsters pictures of people having sex. Typical responses from the kids were “That looks like fun!” or “They must be friends.” No “trauma”.

    Again, like we’ve talked about, it’s not the sex, it’s the connection our society makes between sex and violence and degradation. But then, our society connects everything to violence and degradation: money, work, sports, relationships, sex, god (which is why I wouldn’t be too quick to dismiss that hour of mass you mention above, with huge statues of the dying, bleeding Christ, priests castigating parishioners as “sinners”, inculcating guilt and shame and fear of hell, Old Testament passages about God commanding his soldiers to dash the heads of babies against rocks…)

    I’d much rather my kids watch porn any day…at least the good gay stuff.

  29. 29 Emma

    I think there has never been a truer statement than that last little part about porn-watching being depressing.

  30. 30 Neil

    Hey Pvt. Joker. Thanks for the kind words.

    “No, don’t call me a hero. Do you know who the real heroes are? The guys who wake up every morning and go into their normal jobs, and get a distress call from the commissioner, and take off their glasses and change into capes, and fly around fighting crime. Those are the real heroes.” - Dwight Schrute.

    I’m a big fan of the show, so it’s a pleasure to be actually working on it, too!!

  31. 31 Shawn

    I think it must remain of the utmost importance that we remember that ultimately we are responsible for our own actions.

    Deeming something inherently “good or bad” is often used as a scapegoating mechanism where individuals attempt to remove themselves from any social responsibility or accountability. Media may contain messages and angles but it is our privilege as sentient beings to make informed, educated and responsible decisions.

    I presume this is why we are able to watch action and horror films without being overcome with the impulse to blow things up and kill. Entertainment has value however we watch it with a discerning eye. Porn is indeed entertainment and the only reason why people mistakenly take it as education is because we as a culture do not invest in the education of our youth. Education has fallen upon the shoulders of entertainment, specifically sex education, without the consent of entertainment.

    Bluntly as we all know our sex education system sucks. Thank god for the MWTSS!

    I also highly recommend independently produced adult videos for those who are looking (of legal age of course) for more stimulating movies that stray from the manufactured mainstream.

  32. 32 David

    Omg, porn, keep up the good work!

  33. 33 Chris

    Thank you for entertaining me for the last two hours! I was going to have sex with my girlfriend tonight - but she has her period. So, she let me off the hook. All alone and no where to go, I stumbled on your site. While it was not sexually satisfying - it was entertaining.

    Are you writers on-strike?? Your material is fantastic!
    By the way, I’m in love with Britney. Is she willing to move to New York?

  34. 34 Jim

    Y’know, Internet safety would go great with a discussion of porn. Believe me, I wasn’t quite mentally or technologically prepared when I first found the wonderful world of Harry Potter fan fiction, which caused my computer to become unusable.

    Incidentally, all the gay porn can be found on fanfiction.net. Just remember that it was all written by 13 year old girls who have never seen a man naked–so it’s only slightly different from straight porn, which is written mostly by 14 year old boys who have only seen pictures of naked women. The age difference is merely to account for boys hitting puberty later.

  35. 35 SubtleKnife

    3:42 to 3:53 is the hottest part of Midwest Teen Sex Show EVER!

    I sometimes go to a gay bar with my friends where they have two monitors over the bar, one playing quite hardcore gay porn, the other often playing cartoons or black and white movies. The first time I was there I looked up and told my friends “I know that one!” (And yes, I was talking about the porn…)

    (Jim, try Nifty.org)

  36. 36 SubtleKnife

    PS. Hi to the site admin that checked out my blog a few days ago. You were my 6000th visitor.

  37. 37 speedylilbird

    Jim:

    Not all fanfiction, (Harry Potter, Star Trek, Supernatual, Lord of The Rings, Clarissa Knows All, LOST, House, Ugly Betty, Doctor Who, Grey’s Anatomy, Dallas, etc.) is written by 13 and 14 year old girls and boys, respectively. Loads of it is also written by hetero and GTLB people who started writing in their teens and are now adults or just picked up as an alternate form of porn. A lot of the same sex stories often focus on the relationship and the sex is the proverbial sugar on top.

    My point? Not all fanfic is not created equally.

    So, Nikol and co. This episode was great! Thank you for the Mac vs PC reference! And I too think an episode on the safety of porn online, in a bit more safety tips would be great.

  38. 38 Jen

    Umm Chris,

    As a woman, I totally happen to know that we are quite capable of having sex during our periods. A bit of blood shouldn’t get in the way of good sex. Sure there’s the initial embarrassment, but you two see each other naked and stuff, so what’s the big deal, get some towels, wear a condom, and it’s great. I don’t know if your girlfriend is like me, but I get extremely horny during my period. Sex also helps her relieve cramps and reduces the chance of fibroids developing.

    Great show as always Nikol and Britney. Love the work that the staff does, and I can’t wait for the next episode. You should do one on the dangers of drugs/alcohol and how it can lead to rape and having unprotected sex. Another good topic would be for the first gyno visit and what that all entails, as I know my 17 year old and her friends are totally squeamish about going to the gyno when the time comes. I felt the same way as well.

  39. 39 yourleastfavorite

    The Calvin Klein rip off was hilarious. I hope the younger teens seeing this got the joke though - that was a while ago.

    I’m commenting to rep for erotica and fanfiction, because those things helped me understand and shape my own sexuality when I didn’t have any other outlet. I started out reading fairly dumb stuff, bad Artemis Fowl slash I think, and then got into Harry Potter when I was about 11, and bandslash at 16. Now that I’m 18 (hell yeah, I’m voting this week!), I thank God that I found this stuff.

    The fact that slash (man-on-man) is probably the most common type of fanfiction is telling, I think. At 11 or 12 or 13, I could read sex scenes between men and feel safely removed from it, because I didn’t need to judge what the woman was doing, consider if I would do those things myself, worry about having the same parts as she did. I didn’t have to feel jealousy toward a woman and futile attraction toward a fictional man, because the “goal” of the story is to get the two guys matched up and not to make me wish I was one of the characters. I could focus on what I was starting to learn that I was attracted to - the male body.

    Now that my sexuality is more developed, I can appreciate that I just don’t get turned on by visual porn. I don’t judge porn fans, but sex by nature is hilarious and kind of gross, so when I’m not turned on I’d rather not look at it. Sex for me, and for a lot of women I think, is very mental. Stories get me inside the heads of the characters, so I can feel their weirdness and angst and how bad they want it, how they feel. That works for me.

    There are some fantastic fanfiction authors on the internet, and some of their stuff is porn, some isn’t. One author, called Mistful on Livejournal, is about to publish her first book, and I will be picking it up the day it’s available because her fanfiction stories have impressed me so much. None of the good stuff is on fanfiction.net, by the way - try Livejournal.

    Sadly, the drawback of liking erotica is that a misspelled word or something dumb like “could of” instead of “could’ve” can kill it :-(

  40. 40 SubtleKnife

    yourleastfavorite said:
    Sadly, the drawback of liking erotica is that a misspelled word or something dumb like “could of” instead of “could’ve” can kill it

    so true!

  41. 41 Mari

    nice episode :)
    and i liked how you put in the thing about not taking pictures that could end up on the internet. a surprising number of teenagers like to take pics with their camera phones and send them to their bf/gf. It’s like just asking for them to forget to delete it and then have someone idly search through their phone.

  42. 42 Jude

    Just thought I would comment that i found a group of aussie researchers doing a study of the orgasm face they call it “BeautifulAgony” and its a rather interesting watch… People send videos of them from the neck up as they get off… Its just an interesting thing i found

  43. 43 Will Radik

    I need to get me some o that Shakespearean porn.

  44. 44 Scott the Homosexual

    Nikol, I cannot believe you asked those two boys to make out on your show without trying to get Chris and I to do it! You know I’m very displeased…

  45. 45 John

    i just read what i think is a brilliant book about pornography, and i thought i’d pass along the recommendation. it’s by Robert Jensen and the title is Getting Off: Pornography and the End of Masculinity. it’s definitely anti-mainstream pornography, but it offers a more nuanced argument than you’ll get from Fox News. and a very different argument than you’ll get from there, too. he’s a scholar, too, but not some crazy quack scientist (he’s actually not a scientist at all).

    at the risk of sounding melodramatic, it changed my life….

  46. 46 Jessica

    Jen’s so right! A little blood should definitely not get in the way of good sex! And let’s be honest here, it’s not any grosser than the stuff that comes out of yours…

    And I should also add:

    No clit has ever bled, so get down there and give her some head….

  47. 47 mary

    Kelev,
    I have not mentioned, because I don’t think it’s relevant to make a big deal out of it, but since you bring it up, so will I. I am a professional in the field of public health with a PhD in Interpersonal and Family Communication. If you want just one study that shows a link in a laboratory and shows harm for men, look at Zillman & Bryant, 1982 (unless you do not think it is harmful for men to have negative attitudes towards women). And they only looked at a few hours of porn. And I think it is a mistake to try to look at a culture level study and try to make claims about no harm. I can cite numerous examples of women I know who were involved in porn, or exposed to porn against their will, and forced to act out scenes from porn and try to claim that shows a causal link and we can both claim that the others mode of understanding is not valid science. I think we will have to agree to disagree.
    As I stated, you can never reduce human behavior down to 1 factor, but if you even look at the racist and mysogynistic language in what is now considered “mainstream” porn it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that it’s going to affect someone’s view of a group of people over time.
    As for thinking that I was going for the “addictive” model of porn, no. I am well aware of that field of research and I am not convinced that there is as strong of a link between porn, orgasm and chemicals like meth and brain chemicals. What I do know is that I hear young men saying that they can not have sex with their female partners without thinking about the porn that they masturbated to. And that is a problem for them when they find someone they care about and for their partner, if and when she finds out (basically, she starts feeling like a blow-up doll). That is what I meant by porn is a powerful conditioning mechanism. What is wrong with good old fashioned masturbating without violent images?
    As for the argument that couples who have problems with porn are just couples with all kinds of other problems, that IS often the case, but porn can compound the problem, because it’s just one more place where someone escapes to, the other person has esteem issues with, etc. I mean lets face it–how many times are women looking for a man that is familar with the entire gag factor series as the guy she thought married? And I don’t think it’s an argument that men CAN’T sexually satisfy their female partners, I think it’s more a phenomenon that women no longer feel that they measure up, they don’t want to engage in the acts depicted in porn (now, why a woman wouldn’t want to be doubly penetrated in tha *ss while being called a f*cking wh*re is beyond me). Now, you can say, that’s her problem, she needs to get over it, and that’s fine, I just have a different solution to the problem. Also, some men say they find it easier to just masturbate to the computer image than have sex with their partner–and when I think of all the rhetorical and relational implications of that–then I think that porn and all the other problems the couple is having become further compounded–so removing porn from the picture can be a huge help.
    We do agree on one thing–it’s not the sex–it’s the link between sex and violence, and mainstream porn is full of it. I hadn’t looked at porn in years until recently, and it is really, really scary.
    What I don’t understand is that sex is so good without porn, why do people want to mess it up with porn? To me, porn is sex stripped of all humanity. I’m not against casual sex, if that’s what a person wants, but I am against sex without there being personhood.
    And I don’t advocate censorship, I advocate education.

  48. 48 SubtleKnife

    Scott, I can only imagine this means she has something else in store for you…

  49. 49 Scott the Homosexual

    Well, I would certainly hope so!

    I really like all the discussion on this page. I think porn, as a subject in general, is terribly (and shamefully?) fascinating. I would like to see a new era of porn. Just a whole different take on it all together… I don’t know.

    My personal opinion on porn… I think it’s fine in moderation. I feel people with an addictive personality may become addicted to pornographic materials. I really think we should do all we can to keep children from coming into contact with porn. When I was very young, I saw a porn at a friends house and had so many questions afterword that just couldn’t be answered. It really was a traumatizing experience. It warped some of my sexual opinions and views for many years afterword.

    I equate porn to other special interests available for viewing. Like, those poker shows on tv for example. Yeah, you can sit down and watch people playing poker on tv, but if you know about poker before hand, it really puts the tv show in perspective.

    Does that make sense?

    Anywho, sorry to ramble.
    Luv ya bitches!

  50. 50 Kelev

    Hi Mary,

    Without devolving into a never-ending spiral of point/counter-point, let me say that we probably agree more than disagree (but, yes, on some points we’ll just have to agree to disagree).

    I think one of the biggest areas of differnces in this discussion, one I’ve only mentioned tangentally so far, is the difference between gay and straight porn. As a Queer guy, I see gay porn as far more emancipatory, revelatory and affirming than I’m sure most straight women see (most) hetero porn. Also, most of my own research in this area has been in Europe where the context is (or at least can be) very, very different from the US, or even other Anglo countries. The legacy of Anglo-Protestant-Puritanism has left a stain on colonial, sexual history that, thankfully, continental Europe has largely been spared. As Kinsey said, if only it was Libertine and Enlightenment pilgrims who had crossed the Atlantic instead of Puritans, the American experience would have been very different. Nowhere is this better illustrated (or photographed, or filmed, or broadcast over the internet!) than with porn, and attitudes towards it.

    As I’ve mentioned in other posts, I think everyone has a piece of the truth. ‘Truth’ is so often less of an absolute than a matter of perspective. So much of what we assume as “True” or take for granted, is really only true temporarily, temporally or locally.

    It reminds me of the Buddhist parable of the blind monks holding the elephant; each monk held a different part of the elephant and each argued about the nature of the elephant according to the part they held. The one holding the trunk insisted the animal was long and soft; the one with the ear claimed the elephant was large and flat, the one holding the tusk argued the animal was hard and sharp (and there is even a bawdy version where a monk holds the elephant’s penis - he agrees with the one holding the trunk!). Each monk was “right” in that they each accurately described a piece of the elephant, but they lacked the perspective (vision) to see the greater Whole that encompassed each particular part.

    As a researcher, I feel a sense of mission about always seeking out and providing new perspectives. I think it is especially important where sex is concerned. Far, far too often we, like the monks, are blinded by taboos, superstitions, religions, vested interests and even laws. I think careful, critical and constant examination of these issues is the only thing that will open our eyes.

    Ultimately, I see porn just as I see sex: neither “good” nor “bad” in and of itself, only as good or bad as the individuals themselves and the context they are in, the context they often create. As such, I agree with you that we shouldn’t just look at the socio-cultural level when examining these isssue; there’s the subcultural (such as the Queer subculture, for example), the generational, and individual as well. But in going there, we must acknowledge that there are indiviuals that experience porn in a positive, even healthy manner. Their experience is part of the ‘truth’ as well, and shouldn’t be dismissed or devalued out of hand. No one’s should.

  51. 51 UbiquitousChe

    Q1: Is porn sex?

    Think about that for a second. It’s not as trivial a question as it looks.

    I’d like to consider this first question in light of a second:

    Q2: What is sex?

    There’s a very widespread belief amongst a very large number of people - men and women - that sex is the act of vaginal penetration by the penis. They don’t say it that way - they don’t say it any way. Of course they don’t! It’s boring! But many people believe it anyway.

    So with my man of straw in place, I would like to refute that belief. I claim that sex is not just the act of penetration. Sex is everything leading up to the act of penetration AND it is everything after the act of penetration. Sex is EVERYTHING that goes on in the relationship, even if that relationship is a very casual one. A boyfriend and girlfriend are spending time with eachother at the mall? That’s sex. Even if they’re not sexually active, it’s still a sexually charged relationship. How can it not be? Sex IS the sexual relationship, the sexual relationship IS sex. They’re not two different concepts, they’re the same thing.

    So back to my first question: Is porn sex?

    I say it is. You’re sitting there watching two (or more) people going at it. You’re sexually aroused. You’ve entered into a sexual relationship with the pornographic material. That’s sex!

    If the pornographic material is angry and violent, guess what? You’re having angry and violent sex!

    If the pornographic material is degrading to women, guess what? You’re engaging in sex that is degrading to women!

    Also, when a group of men get together to watch porn they are all engaging in a sexual act. Together. With no women in the room. Tell that to a group of men who watch porn and you can spot the homophobes by how badly they flinch.

    At the same time, I also say that there are kinds of porn that are not angry and violent, that are not degrading to women. I can think of two off the top of my head, but this post is wordy enough without the descriptions. I’ll give them if anyone’s interested enough.

    So the point of my argument is this: That when engaging with pornographic material, it is important not to suspend the considerations you would normally have when engaging with another person. Even your sexual fantasies deserve your respect and dignity.

  52. 52 Scott the Homosexual

    Geez

  53. 53 UbiquitousChe

    Aww, c’mon! This is the internet, d*mnit! I’m sure someone out there feels like ripping into my argument. It’s plain boring if no one so much as tries.

  54. 54 Simon

    Hey Nikol, I emailed you back and your email is full! I was so sad after getting your email back and being all excited. I wrote a couple of ideas for what we talked about and I hope we find a way to communicate some other way. Hope to hear from you soon.

    -Simon

  55. 55 Otto

    soooo, foursomes, any chance on a show about that soon?

  56. 56 Scott the Homosexual

    UbiquitousChe, don’t be so naughty ;-p…

    I’m willing to bet the kind of porn you watch has lots of nipple crimping and scrotums being pinched with clothespins.

    Yeah, I nailed that right on the head, didn’t I?

  57. 57 Rob

    Porn/Sex can be kinda depressing. When you’re not horny and thinking about it, neither seems that exciting…

    Poor Rocky… I had a Rabbit named Rocky. He died… So we got another one to keep my other Rabbit company…. Course Rocky and Velveteen seemed to be gay.. but then animal-smart people say it was a dominance thing… But then Shadow will fight Velveteen, when Velveteen only tries to hump….

  58. 58 Anna

    Excellent show!
    As for future topics, someone mentioned the first gyno visit and I think thats a great idea for a show!

  59. 59 Deja-Vu

    UbiquitousChe-
    I give you a ten for creativity. Heres my challenge though…. wait…
    Scott is a homosexual?
    all my dreams are shattered. I need a drink.

  60. 60 Jiz

    There are many films out there that are feminist, some shot in a documentary style, others in an educational realm, which adequately portray sex in an authentic, consensual, and politically responsible manner.

    Some directors include:
    *Tristan Taormino
    *Shine Louise Houston
    *Tony Comstock
    *Candida Royalle

    As UbiquitousChe has seemingly pointed out, like sex, porn is not so easily defined and there are many ways to represent it. ; )

  61. 61 UbiquitousChe

    Scott: Firstly, I’ll be as naughty as I damn well like, thankyouverymuch. :D And as for the porn I watch, I’m sorry to dissapoint but mostly I shy away from stuff involving toys and whatnot. Mostly I just watch large numbers of people doin’ it - although I’ll always have a special place in my heart for GOOD lesbian porn.

    Deja: Yep, he’s a homosexual. Flirtatious bastard too. Pity I’m straight. :D

    Jiz: You realize I’m now going to have to look all these directors up now, don’t you?

  62. 62 MA Wedding Videographer

    HAHAHAAHAHAHHAHHA

  63. 63 Tony

    Britney, will you go out with me?

  64. 64 Kevin

    You guys rule. So glad to see you getting airtime on mainstream media. You should definitely get a paying gig for your talents in comedy, film and sex ed. Is there a market for that last one?

    Anyway, I appreciate what you’re doing, don’t agree with everything you say, but will recommend your show happily!

  65. 65 Big D

    You know … When i first happened across this i was astonished at the whole show. But after watching this she has a point. I mean in schools now sex ed is based on oh we can say this or we cant speak about that… and 99% of the time by the time the kids hit that class if its even offered they have already engaged in risky behavior that if by chance lands somone pregnant at say 14 or 15.. I mean granted Its blunt but i have to say there is no better way to approch this… and porn is a problem. I have met people that are afraid of real women and think that if they “speak to a girl they should be down on the floor blowing their last breath to suck down a load of cum.” (that was a direct quote) this kid i quoted it from is a highschool junior… by then most people have done something sexual… This is a real problem when kids would rather sit infront of a computer and jerk off instead of going out and meeting real women… Ive had a “porn star girlfriend” and it was hell. id rather have a real women who knows how to have fun and pleasure then the “porn star”

  66. 66 deb

    So what is the deal? Why no visual aid for female masturbation, you had the cow for the boys!!

    Girls need to know that their vulva can clit are not so mysterious–though i really do appreciate the humor of the bush trek :)

    there are a ton of things that look like the vulva, an open peach, an open (cooked) mussel, many orchids, etc. all of which you could have used to demonstrate how to find and tickle/rub/love the clit, or even how to insert something into the vestibule of the vagina–where all those wonderful nerve endings live.

    your work is wonderful, i am a mother of three, and am glad your work is out there for kids. But please don’t perputuate the mystery of girl parts. Do one more for girls please with a visual aid. thanks!

    deb lee-thornby, sex therapist and mommy

  67. 67 UbiquitousChe

    deb:

    Holy cow… That bit’s called a vestibule?

    I remember back to my first girlfriend. I’d looked up some sexuality sites - and some porn - and as dry as it sounds, some very detailed human anatomy textbooks - to work out what the hell I was meant to be doing down there. She would always direct me to what I now think is this vestibule thing. She thought that was her clitoris.

    After a few sessions of this, she asked me why I kept on wandering up from her ‘clitoris’. I told her that I was pretty sure that where I was ‘wandering up’ to was where her clitoris /was/, but since she enjoyed me doing what I was doing I was happy enough stick to that if she wanted.

    She told me off a bit in that adorable, patronising way women have when us guys do something foolish and male. A few weeks later we found her clitoris. I was right, and she was having too much fun to be annoyed at my smugness. Anyway, she had two places that worked for us. We were as happy as the proverbial dog with two hypersensitive erogenous zones. :D

  68. 68 Tim

    Great episode. Ladder/mosh part was genius. Most porn “stars” aren’t stars! Just actors. I think star implies that you are known widely in society.

    This is the only episode I’ve watched so far, but looks like a good site. MTSS is getting a little press and I was directed here from a “do you know what your kids are reading on the internet” type story on our local fox station.

  69. 69 mom

    You are SO midwest! “Down by the crick in the squirrel pile” roflmao

    I first heard it called a crick when I moved to Missouri.

    Memories. Nothing more than memories.

    I must require sleep, I am getting goofy!

  70. 70 Halcyon

    That was fantastic!

  71. 71 atomicpop!

    just stumbled across your site - for the first time in my life i wish i had teenaged kids just so i could show them this - it’s a brilliant take on sex ed. kudo’s to you.

    i did send it to my bf who’s studing to be a social worker specializing in gay teenagers. thought he would get a kick out of it.

    continue the good work.

    cheers.
    kyle

  72. 72 Ross

    Who took the time to come up with the quotes from “Venus and Adonis” and 2 Henry IV someone enjoyed there literature in college…..

  73. 73 Tamsen

    Great show as always (I’m way late to this one), hope Britney is healed after that stunt - damn! LOVED the real woman vs. porn star woman.

  74. 74 Branz

    I love your show, but unfortunately I am not your target demographic. As a bi female (adult), I find most of your stuff unbelievably accurate. I have lived in Missouri my whole life, and the sex education is essentially non existent. Every new episode is like a present for me! I have shown it to most of my friends, and we just laugh hysterically. BTW, Scott, I wish I could hook you up with one of my friends. And Nikol… I love you! Britney too.
    The latest episode… Shakespeare did write some crazy smut, if you can get past the old English dialect. Calvin Klein reference was great, but I doubt your “target audience” will recognize it. “O… your… feminine… lips…” that scene was a little graphic, but so true. Good luck, and keep it up!

  75. 75 Justin

    Everything we experience affects us, porn, news, movies, books, radio, real life. Ever seen someone die, get hit by a car, break a bone, chip a nail? Ever listened to a song on the radio about love and felt fuzzy, or a misogynistic song and felt like cussing out the next woman you saw? Ever read a book about knights and felt chivalrous, saw Once Were Warriors and felt like beating someone up, seen news about a war and felt sad, or saw bad porn and wondered ‘does my partner want to fuck her in the ass like that?”

    Everything you experience changes you, some things you can’t choose, some you can. Don’t settle for bad books, movies, songs or Porn! Ask your local Adult Store to carry better directors (like those mentioned above), get your friends together and see a non-standard-Hollywood movie, buy some good books and donate them to your library, and buy some good porn and give the people around you a chance to see some more interesting sex with an actual plot line.

  76. 76 Bjorn

    “The internet did not invent born, Abraham Lincoln did!”

    If that aint the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. But hey, what can you expect from Americans.

  77. 77 Robert

    I prefer watching real women,even if it doesn’t show the naughty bits.

    E.g. Beautifulagony.com = Hot

  78. 78 Kel

    AHAHAHAHAHA.
    Sorry, but this is my favorite site besides MySpace. GOD. I always freak out when there’s a new episode. :]
    And, I love reading the discussions. Excellent stuff.
    Keep up the good work!!
    ~K

  79. 79 jocie

    hey this stuff is reeally funny, i think it was so clever to make this website, its something that us teen agers would really watch

  80. 80 H-Barbz

    This is definitely my favorite episode….I lol’d. :D Good job!

  81. 81 will

    OMG! i luvd the mosh! haha

  82. 82 cory

    you are really cute

  83. 83 cory

    so i would love to see u in person

  84. 84 Reece

    what is jean sitting?

  85. 85 Claire

    Great episode, Guy

  86. 86 KARTAL

    sex you gril my msn adress gard_team_007@hotmail.com

  87. 87 Portlander

    I noticed this mentioned several times and have to agree, the one thing regarding porn that really needs to be taught and rarely ever is… is Internet safety. The Internet is a great tool, but browsing the darker recesses without knowing what you’re doing is as safe as screwing 2-dollar whores in SE Asia without a condom. Your computer isn’t going to appreciate it at all, though luckily a new computer tends to cost significantly less than a crack baby.

    I work with computers for a living, and frequently have to fix coworker’s computers, and often help out with home PCs, and at -least- 40% of all problems come from porn sites. As a by the way, another 30% or so comes from downloading games off the Internet, so that’s almost as bad. Most of these problems could be easily alleviated by having the same chat I had with my younger siblings about Internet safety, keeping good antivirus software updated, regularly scanning your computer, and being careful where you go browsing. I especially recommend getting more than one antivirus, since why go with just a condom when you can take the pill too just in case?

    There’s tons of free porn on the Internet, and you don’t need to go to sites whose profits depend on compromising your computer in order to find it. If you’re willing to pay though, try looking for sites that have no advertisements on them. It probably means their porn is high enough quality to stand on its own.

  88. 88 emrah

    I love you sex teen.

  89. 89 Koth

    The feminist in me must point out that you said girl on girl vs. man on man rather than woman on woman vs. man on man or girl on girl vs. boy on boy.

    Come on now =/

    Other than that, great, entertaining. Loved the off the clock porn star and that the star was a chubby male =P

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